Monday, March 21, 2011


As a much more famous blogger once stated, "printers were sent from Hell."  And I'm sure we're all inclined to agree.  I myself was not sold on this idea in a desperate attempt to preserve some good karmic energy.  But there's no avoiding it now.  If printers aren't evil, then at least they're stupid.  I honestly don't know why we trust those things with so many important documents and urgent matters.

Dumb as a box of rocks? Dumb as a plastic box full of technological magic.

Last night my mother emailed me a copy of an important tax form.  My task was simple enough.  Print, sign where highlighted, scan, send back.  I had two printing options: my so-far-so-good reliable in-room printer which had recently been complaining of low ink, or the computer lab with $57 saved up in print credits that was tragically four flights of stairs away.  Siding with laziness, I decided to open the PDF and print it in my room, despite my fear of an empty ink cartridge.  I busied myself with Facebook and emails, waiting for the printing job to process and complete.  It took a bit longer than I anticipated.


Oh, thanks, printer.  A good thick 7x10 block of my black ink of which the cartridge was apparently running out.  I was hoping to save that so thank you for giving it to me all at once so I can put it some place safe and dry and USELESS AAAUUUGHHHHHHGHGRRRGGOHRAAARRGHHH 

Because the PDF file was clearly bugged I decided to do it my OWN way. Thankfully I know my way around a MicroSoft Paint program or two.  I screen-shotted the two halves of the document and copy/pasted them together, making use of transparent overlaying to match up the seams.  I printed this new much more reliable document, signed it, scanned it, and resaved it as a PDF, and it was totally taken for legitimate.

Eff off, printers.  Marry me, MSPaint.

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