Tuesday, April 5, 2011

The Pig-Man of Res Life

A pig is trying to ruin my life.

Head of my school's Residential Life, this pig-man has come into a surprising bit of power as next year's room selection draws to a close.  I paid him a visit in hopes to sort out the shambles of my living situation and the best he did was piss me off and tell me nothing I ever want could ever possibly work out.  His best case scenario for me was honestly my idea of the worst case scenario before I entered the office.  The only advice he gave me was to come back often and check if anything new shows up.

After talking down to me and rejecting my suggestions (do pigmen find feasting upon dignity and self-confidence a source of good nutrition?), there was not much left for me to do but leave.  Not only did he not care, it was as if I was wasting his time!  It's his job to help me find a place to live and all he did was tell me where I could never get in.  He was more ruinous than helpful.  I curled my lips into a cordial smile, ending the battle but not quite the war.

"Okay, well, there are your options. Cool?" He tried to sound casual, nonchalant even.  I responded quicker than I could stop myself. "No, actually. Not 'cool'. But I accept the rules for what they are. Thank you for your time."

You may be a powerful pig-man, but I, sir, am a dragon.  And who knows when I might want bacon for breakfast.

I'm sure he's a wonderful guy.  I however do not agree.

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